The first step in fixing relationship problems is to discover what the problem really is. We think that the problem is whatís happening, but this isnít the problem. This is the symptom of something deeper. The real problem is an underlying condition that forces the two of you to act in a way that destroys love and sabotages your relationship. The key to fixing relationships problems is to take the focus off of whatís happening and put the focus on finding and removing this destructive underlying condition. Fortunately, the process for fixing relationship problems is relatively simple, but you need to learn how.
You need more than love to fix a relationship
Love is never enough to have a relationship work. The divorce courts are full of people who love each other. For example, what good is someoneís love for you if you don't feel loved? Itís worthless. At the same time, what good is your love for someone if that person doesnít feel loved? Itís worthless too. The key to having a relationship be great is to make sure the other person feels loved. Ultimately, this is the key to fixing relationship problems. Unfortunately, this is much easier said than done. We get triggered and automatically act in a way that destroys the experience of love.
The real relationship problem
The key to fixing relationship problems is to find and remove the real cause of the problem. Ultimately, the real problem is a nerve that is being triggered. The automatic, subconscious avoidance of this nerve forces us to act in a way that destroys love. When this nerve gets triggered, we subconsciously feel threatened and get defensive. We then operate in a state of fear, upset and tunnel vision. We fight, resist, hang on and withdraw. We destroy love and make our situation worse. One of the keys to fixing relationship problems is to find and heal this suppressed childhood hurt. Fortunately, this can happen and it can happen relatively fast.
What happens in relationships
In relationships, these nerves tend to collide. For example, letís say that I act in a way that strikes your nerve. Then you get defensive and act in a way that strikes my nerve. Then I get upset and strike your nerve. Then you strike mine. Without knowing, we create a cycle of conflict, a cycle of fighting, resisting, hanging on and withdrawing from each other. The experience of love fades and the problem is born. If fixing relationship problems is important to you, find and remove this destructive cycle of conflict. Heal the hurt and restore the love. Bill Ferguson can show you how.
What needs to be done when fixing problems
There are several steps to fixing relationship problems. The first step is to identify the underlying condition that is creating the problem. In most cases there will be an underlying cycle of conflict, a cycle of fighting, resisting, hanging on and withdrawing from each other. Whatever the condition is, it will be fueled by the automatic, subconscious avoidance of a suppressed childhood hurt. The second step in fixing relationship problems is to find and heal this hurt. Incidentally, finding and healing this hurt is one of the most important things you can ever do. Until you heal this hurt, you will be forced to repeat the past. The third step in fixing relationship problems is to gain the tools and the awareness you need to create and maintain love in your relationship.
Fixing relationship problems
We are here to support you in fixing relationship problems. There are a number of ways we can do this. First, we have frequent workshops in Houston. Our most important program is a life changing weekend workshop called Return To The Heart. We also have a bookstore and offer individual support. One of the best ways to handle your situation is to schedule an appointment with Bill Ferguson. He can walk you through the process of fixing relationship problems. We also have the Mastery of Life Audio Course and a free Mastery of Life E-Course. Our workshops are in Houston, TX. Individual support is available in person and by telephone.
Watch Bill Ferguson talk about what creates and destroys love
For more information on Fixing Relationship Problems Call 713-520-5370
As a former divorce attorney, Bill Ferguson gained national attention for his ability to heal relationships. 15% of his clients never divorced and the ones who did were able to part as friends.
The Texas Counseling Association thinks so highly of his work, they asked him to deliver the keynote address at their annual convention. He taught his approach to over 2,300 counselors and therapists. He has led over 2,000 workshops and has worked with thousands of individuals. Learn more about Bill