The key to releasing guilt is to recognize that we all go through life doing the very best we can with the limited ability that we have at the time. Unfortunately, this limited ability results in mistakes. Sometimes we make big ones.
Making mistakes is part of the human process. This is how we learn. Every time you make a mistake you learn a little more about life. You become wiser and more aware.
Five years from now you will be much wiser than you are today, but the wisdom you will have five years from now doesn't do you any good today. This is true because today, you don't have it.
Likewise the wisdom that you have today didn't do you any good back when you made your mistake. This is true because back then, you didn't know what you know today. You only knew what you knew.
To see this in your life, select a guilt that you would like to be free of. Now go back in time to the moment you made your mistake.
Notice that at the time, you had a very particular state of mind and a very particular way of seeing life. Notice that you acted totally consistent with where you were at the moment.
If you knew then what you know today, you would have acted very differently, but you didn't. Even if you thought you knew better, you didn't know the consequences like you do today.
So here is the big question: Are you willing to forgive yourself for not knowing? Are you willing to forgive yourself for not being wiser and more aware?
You might as well. If you look, you did the very best you could with the limited awareness and ability that you had at the time.
So forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for not being wiser and more aware. Forgive yourself for acting totally consistent with your limited awareness and forgive yourself for any damage that was caused as a result of your not knowing.
Allow yourself to be human.
Resentment
When you have a resentment, a major part of you closes down. You become bitter and less able to express your love. You lose your aliveness and your joy for life. You put up walls of protection and you make your life more difficult.
Letting go of a resentment is not for the benefit of the other person. It's for you.
When you resent someone, you are saying very forcefully, that the other person is the problem, the cause and the fault. Not you. You forcefully blame the other person so you don't have to look at yourself.
If you looked at yourself, you would have to experience all the hurt from what happened. You would have to feel all the hurt of feeling not good enough, not worth loving or some other form of "not okay". In an automatic, subconscious attempt to avoid this hurt, you resent.
The first step in releasing a resentment is to find and heal this hurt. Go to the hurt that’s under the resentment and ask what those circumstances say about you.
Do they say that you are worthless, not worth loving or not good enough? Find the hurt that is under your resentment. Then dive into the hurt and feel it willingly like a child. Cry if you can.
To learn more about healing this hurt, read the articles, Heal The Hurt and Find Your Inner Issues.
Once you are willing to feel this hurt, you no longer need to avoid it and the resentment loses power.
The next step is to notice that the person you resent has a very particular state of mind, a very limited awareness, and a very particular way of seeing life.
Now notice that if this person was wiser and more aware, then he or she would be able to act in a very different way, but the person isn't wiser and more aware. This person has very limited ability and a very limited way of seeing life.
If you look, this person is doing the very best he or she can with his or her limited ability. Notice how much this person suffers as a result of this limited ability.
Now ask yourself, Are you willing to forgive this person for not being wiser and more aware? Are you willing to forgive this person for acting consistent with his or her limited ability? Are you willing for forgive this person for whatever damage he or she caused?
You might as well. Your resentment certainly doesn’t change anything.
Remember that forgiveness is for the benefit of you, not the other person. Forgiveness is also a choice. Let go of your resentment because you choose to. Then get on with your life.
The information in these articles is valuable, but knowing it intellectually won’t change your life. Getting it in your heart will. That’s the purpose of our programs.
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